I’m a relative novice when it comes to domestic discipline. However, after many years exploring in the D/s lifestyle, I’ve found a “home and comfort zone.” There has been clarity, as though the many pieces of the puzzle suddenly fell into place. There are numerous other aspects to the D/s lifestyle I still love and will incorporate in to my relationship with db but domestic discipline has quickly evolved into our foundation.
Db and I originally made our connection because of our mutual interest in domestic discipline. Since then, we have talked at great length, and put into practice components that are appropriate for our relationship. There is certainly a sexually intense side that we both experience but more so there is a safety and a feeling of security.
She has a deep need for structure. DD helps with her health, being on time, accountability, etc. I am still amazed and fascinated by her immediate change in tone and demeanor when I deliberately take over in a given situation to mold and give her structure. It’s as though a calm comes over her like a breath of wind coming through the window on a spring day. And I am at my best when I experience her feeling of safety and contentment. I feel an incredible bond to her when she so naturally abides by my leadership in the relationship. Never have I experienced someone so naturally desirous of and willing to surrender.
We are so excited about our new home. It’s been a challenge to create a domestic discipline environment with the distance between us. Structure and accountability will be attained so much more easily; for example to integrate eye contact with voice tones will be extraordinary. This will only enhance her natural desire to submit and please; something I so deeply admire and respect. She trusts me and my judgment. It’s an honor I will never take lightly or for granted.
Punishment and correction will be much more thorough and intimate. To some that might be frightening but she displays a sense of calm knowing she will have the structure and security she has craved for so long. Punishments to this point have been fairly limited to things like corner time, writing lines and insertion and wearing of a large butt plug. Once she is home, there will be more spanking, clamps and other behavior modification techniques. Additionally, consistent maintenance spankings will serve to keep her in a more relaxed state and strengthen our bond. To witness her relief from a maintenance spanking and also her release of guilt from an infraction after receiving punishment and being forgiven gives me incredible joy. I just want her to feel safe and happy.
Like anything in the lifestyle, we will continue to feel our way through our domestic discipline dynamic. We will continue to find what works for us, modify and refine, and leave the rest behind. Our foundation has been laid and we will continue to build all aspects of our life together. Philosophical discussions, creating meals together and for each other, her desire to have me fuck her purely for my pleasure, her feeling of safety and love, watching old and discovering new favorite movies, engaging in the local kink community, her discovery of new friends, blogging, anal training, the intimacy of watersports, the dogs, work and the list goes on.
So begins our life as a loving HOH and Dominant, and a loving and serene TIH and submissive. We are both so very blessed.